where did i go wrong?

you know how much i love you. you know that you mean everything to me. but you must know this:

sometimes, i feel like i hate you. (and yes, i am fully aware of how big the word 'hate' is. but i can't help the way i feel.)
sometimes i feel that you're too selfish; looking for fun for yourself only and forgetting the fact that i've always been there by your side.
sometimes i wish i could just leave you.
sometimes i feel like im stuck or forced to sit with you.
sometimes i feel lost.
sometimes i hate myself so much for going through what i go through, because of you, and never doing a thing about it.
sometimes, you're the reason, i don't wanna live anymore.
sometimes, you're the reason i hate my life.
sometimes i don't feel safe having you by my side.
sometimes i wish i could tell you how i feel.
sometimes i just wanna leave you, be free, and live my life without you taking any part in it.
sometimes i just wanna sit down and cry, and not have you by my side.
sometimes i don't want you to call me.
sometimes i don't want you to talk to me.
sometimes i don't want to wait for you.
sometimes i don't want you to wait for me.
sometimes i regret ever knowing you,
because sometimes you're not there for me.
because sometimes you'd rather hang out with them.
because sometimes you'd let me walk alone.
because sometimes you'd laugh louder with them. (fake laugh, maybe?)
because sometimes you don't wanna take the blame. (even though you might know you were wrong)
because sometimes when i try to talk to you you think i'm being silly...
you think i'm being emotional...
you think i'm making a big deal outta nothing...
when was i ever not there for you?
where did i ever go wrong?
i know that i'm not perfect. i make at least one mistake in everyday of my life. but hey, i always apologize for my actions.
you rarely apologize.
whenever i wanna hear your sincere apology, it never comes out of your mouth.
why did i ever pick you?
why are you doing this to me?

meh. i hate how my bring controls and gets the better of me
-_-